How to Deal with Emotional Pain

We’re talking pain this week. I’ve been trying to write a post on the Heavy Metal Detox Smoothie for weeks you guys. I told you it’s coming. And it is. Promise.

But this week, it came in so loud and clear. We have to talk about the emotional pain that comes with choosing to heal our acne holistically and saying NO to the "quick fixes" that never work.

Because trust me when I say, you are not alone.

It’s probably the number one thing girls reach out to me about. How much they’re hurting, suffering, crying. What can they do?! They’re desperate...

And even if you’ve never had a pimple in your life (one, I hate you. Two, who are you?!), just take a moment and think about something on your physical body you’re really insecure about.

Ouch. That hurts, right?!

Now imagine it ON YOUR FACE. ALL THE TIME. AND IT HURTS. LITERALLY. DON’T TOUCH ME.

I don't want to make this about my pain vs. your pain. Honestly, insecurities are real and painful and they suck.

Whether it’s acne, weight gain, thinning hair, man boobs...we all have something we don’t like about ourselves.

How’s that for a human connection?

But we’re not here to dwell on the things we don’t like about ourselves. We’re here to accept them. Heck, even embrace them. HELL, possibly even love them.

Baby steps.

So if you don’t have acne, I still invite you to read along. For the remaining part of this post, when I say skin or acne, just replace it with your personal "thing".

Alright, so how do you deal with the emotional pain of acne?

These are 7 things that have really helped me during those dark times when I was transitioning from a conventional approach of fixing to a holistic one of healing:

1. Feel It

We’ll start with just feeling the pain...intentionally. Pain (or any emotion for that matter) is literally just energy that wants to move through and out of you. It’s energy that you’ve been lugging around for a long time. Energy that’s been burrowed so deep down in there, a big reason why it hurts so much is because you almost don’t know how to function without it. That’s pain.

Don’t hold onto it. You’re only suppressing it and keeping it in you.

So when you start to feel depressed about your skin, just feel it. Sit with it. Acknowledge it. Allow yourself to feel sad, even if it hurts.

And CRY if you need to. Cry all you want. Salt water is one of the most cleansing medicines on Earth.

2. Move

Once you allow yourself to feel the pain, you have to move it out of you. Move your body. Go for a walk. A run. Take a yoga class. Or do what I do, headphones on, reggeaton full blast, and dance alone in front of the mirror. Works every time!

It doesn’t matter how you move, just move that energy out of your emotional body by moving your physical body.

3. Love Letters

You need to switch the relationship with your skin from one of hate and attack to one of love and acceptance.

Pull out a pen and paper and just start writing.

“Dear Skin,”

Pour your heart out. Say what you gotta say.

If you need to, you can start with anger. But end it with love.

Let her know you forgive her. You hear her. You see her. Thank her for the years of warning signs. That you’re ready to listen and take this seriously. You’re ready to help her in a gentle, loving way.

Tell her you love her unconditionally, no matter what. You will not abandon her. You are here. To stay.

Tell her whatever you want.

“I love you always, Janelle”

4. Love Notes

You wrote your love letter. Now it’s time to remind your skin how much you love her. Every. Single. Day. Write a few love notes and leave them in your bathroom mirror, bedroom mirror, every single mirror.

“You are beautiful!” “You are glowing gorgeous!” “Thank you for not giving up on me!” “I’m so proud of you!”

And open up that notepad on your phone, write another love note, screen shot that s%*t, and say hello to your new wallpaper.

I want love notes everywhere you look. Because your skin (and YOU) deserve to know how gorgeous and glowing you already are!

5. Angel of Healing

We all have one. And She’s ready to help. Pray out loud. This has to be done out loud. Ask Her to heal you, to guide you, to help you make the right decisions, to hold you when you’re feeling down.

This prayer has probably been the number one thing that’s gotten me out of those dark times.

She’s there for you, whenever you need Her. Simply call upon Her. Remember, out loud.

6. Don’t Obsess

I know this one is tough. But the second I stopped analyzing my skin, picking at my skin, trying every product under the Mayan sun for my skin, was when I FINALLY relaxed.

I focused on healing from the inside out, loving myself, following the protocol, eating plants, being super gentle with my skin, and doing things that bring me joy like salsa dancing, traveling solo, and rambling on the gram.

7. Reach Out

If all else fails, call your mom. Again, WHEN ALL ELSE FAILS. She just LOVES it when I call her crying about my pimples. Loves it.

Or reach out to a fellow skin sister that gets it. Send a DM on insta. I do it all the time. The right one will respond and help you. That's what this Medical Medium community is for.

You don't have to crawl and scratch your way out of the dark hole alone. They're are sisters on your path that know EXACTLY what you're going thru reaching out a hand.

No more suffering in silence like you're the ONLY one in the world with adult acne. You aren't.

Moving Forward

We need to talk about this. We need to have the conversation. We need to ask for help from those who are going thru the same thing.

There's nothing to be ashamed of.

And if you haven’t already, you will soon realize this isn’t really about your skin. It’s about loving yourself unconditionally just as you are.

Because, need I remind you...you’re glowing gorgeous!

I love you always, Janelle

P.S- Remember, Patience is our greatest teacher. The reason why a lot of us suffer when we first transition to holistic healing is because we're so used to the quick fixes those creams and pills give us...but just as quick as they work, they don't work. We have to get used to being in tune with the rhythm of nature. Look at the way a seed turns into a plant...it takes time. The same is true with us. We're not separate from that rhythm, from that pace. So I know the adjustment period is painful, we're re-wiring the way we think and function, but release those old habits that are not serving you, and embrace the rhythm, your rhythm.