Why I Started Blogging
“'Who the hell do you think you are?’ your darkest interior voice will demand. ‘It’s funny you should ask,’ you can reply. ‘I’ll tell you who I am: I am a child of God, just like anyone else. I am a constituent of the universe. I have invisible spirit benefactors who believe in me, and who labor alongside me. The fact that I am here at all is evidence that I have the right to be here. I have a right to my own voice and a right to my own vision. I have a right to collaborate with creativity, because I myself am a product and a consequence of Creation. I’m on a mission of artistic liberation, so let the girl go.’” – Elizabeth Gilbert, Big Magic
I’ve always loved writing. As a child I dreamed of one day becoming the next Beverly Cleary. I hid diaries under my bed with pages and pages of my whimsical wonders (and still do). I even began writing my very own novel at the age of 12, a thriller about a young girl whose frequent nightmares were becoming reality. Unfortunately this potential New York Times Best Seller never hit the bookshelves because my dear mother thought the crumbled up pieces of paper under my bed was trash. Isn’t there so much beauty in the imagination of a child? To think that at the tender age of 12 I was capable of writing a novel...to sell. It’s a shame that that magic dwindles with time.
Then I blinked and was 18. I was getting ready for college and that ever-daunting question loomed over my head “what do I want to be when I grow up?” I had to major in medicine, law or business, right? After all, those are the fields with guaranteed jobs after school, right? I chose Marketing because it was somewhat creative and in the school of business. I hated my classes, which were mostly accounting & statistics courses. I even dared to switch my major one semester to Creative Writing. I felt like I was committing a God-awful crime that felt so right yet so wrong, so back to the school of business I went. Writing was slowly becoming my passion that I wasn’t nurturing. I was ignoring what I always loved, to the point that I forgot I even loved it. I graduated college in 2010 with a B.S. in Marketing and a Minor in Communications and was ready to tackle corporate America, or whatever.
And then next thing I know I’m a semi-adult still asking myself “what do I want to be when I grow up!?” I’ve been working for a few years, slowly and reluctantly climbing up this corporate ladder, wondering why everyone is in such a rush to get to the top. I’m in my mid-20’s trying to rekindle a lost passion in my life, because I sure as hell know this job isn’t it. I started retrieving to my childhood, making lists of all of the things I loved doing as a a little girl, things I would do if money weren’t a factor. For me writing has not only always been my passion, but I genuinely believe it’s my gift. How do I know? Because when I write I feel alive. When I write I can effortlessly be myself. When I write I feel inspired. So, how can I craft a career around my passion? After many evenings of praying fervently for some guidance, for some answers, I began to receive very clear signs, answers that came in so loud & clear I couldn't ignore it. I needed to spend some time reawakening my lost passion, traveling and using my journey as my teacher, and giving 100% of my time & effort to writing. So, I left my job and started a blog.
Oh, trust me when I say this decision didn’t come easy. If you think you’re critical of my writing, you do not want to meet Janelle the Critic. Geez, she can be such a btch! She had nothing better to do all day but remind me that I wasn’t good enough. “Who the hell do you think you are? A WRITER!?! HA, laughable!” On and on and on this little doom radio played in my head all day, everyday. It took months of therapy, self-love rituals, daily affirmations and an unwavering faith to believe what I already knew to be true…I was good enough. I had to get over perfection and accept that my writing isn’t perfect. I know there are probably a handful of grammatical errors all over this little piece right here, perhaps even some spelling errors. I’m not an English teacher, nor do I ever want to be. But that’s what’s so lovely about writing from the heart, what I like to call soul writing. That’s what’s so lovely about doing ANYTHING from the heart. It’s not about perfection; it’s about effort, commitment & progress, & most importantly, it's about personality.
When deciding whether I should leave my job and pursue my dream of being a writer it came down to this simple concept: life is too short, this world is too big and you are too much of a gift to not live a life that’s true to you, to not do what you were born to do, to not be who you were born to be. God gave you a gift and it’s your duty to believe in your gift and share it with the world. Truly, it’s your only purpose in life. Point, blank, PERIOD. See, simple.
So, why did I start blogging? I started blogging because I love writing & I love to share. I started blogging because I have a voice that I know is important and wants to be heard, no, better yet, deserves to be heard. I started blogging to manifest my dreams. I started blogging in hopes of inspiring many other young women like myself to take the risk, listen to their hearts and answer their calling. I started blogging because I want to change the world, even if that means just changing the world of one reader. I started blogging because you have to start somewhere.
